Monday, August 9, 2010

12 Days to Go - Race Report! My first Sports "Massage"



Neon Massage Sauna  
I was going to start this off with the title of, Top Ten things I learned from a DNF at the Sports Massage, but I actually finished so I can't say that.


As you can probably tell from the previous post, I felt more at ease going into doing a spur-of-the-moment first time 50-miler than going to my first "Massage" session.  I even had a last minute gear acquisition run to make sure I was properly prepared.

As I stepped into the office and was brought back to the "Massage" room, somehow the whole thing seemed to fit into every bad stereotype I had of "Massages".

Lady Masseuse dressed in fluorescent flowered garb- check.
Dim mood lighting - check.
Strange, soft, Enya type music in the background - check.
What looks like a bed? in the tiny closet of a room that all of this is taking place in - check.
Candles! - check.

Diving Suit in the Vasa MuseetAce - Ready for the rub down
I enter into the room and she starts talking but my mind is racing.  "If she turns her back can I make it out before she notices?"  "Will people in the hallway be able to hear my screams"  "Are there hidden video cameras in here somewhere and is this being streamed to some seedy site in Turkmenistan?"  All of this is suddenly brought to an immediate, screeching halt when the phrase "undress to your comfort level" makes it's way through to may convoluted brain.  !?!?!!?  Comfort level?  How about a three piece suit?  How about one of those world war II dive suits with the big round helmets?  What kind of comfort are we talking about here?  Schnikes!

Everything after that is a blur of awkwardness and "going to my happy place" followed by a whole lot of hushed voices, blanket manipulation, muscle assault and ended with someone rubbing my ears.  Ears?  Really?  Is this helpful?  Will increased blood flow to my lobes help me up Hope Pass twice?  I don't know but I assume it must.

All in all it wasn't as bad as I thought it might be.  Hopefully it was somewhat helpful.  I did feel pretty relaxed, though it could be just a relative improvement from the buttery pretzel knot I was going in.

Would I do it again?  Hmmm not sure about that one, I'll just stick with my new "massage" PR.  One sports "massage" in one hour.  Pretty fast I must say so myself.  What is your "Massage" PR?

INJURY REPORT
Been to the doctor:  No.  (Thank you incompetent appointment schedulers)  I will go this week.
Running of late: No.  I've been thrashing about in a pool for cardio, more on that to come.
Taper Madness: Off the Chart.







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